From the back of beyond…wherever that is.

March 1st, 2009

Daughter is here with us in the “back of beyond” as she calls it.  She flew in from Chicago yesterday, bringing with her Chicago weather which promises to dump 6″ to 8″ of snow upon our heads starting tonight and continuing tomorrow.  We are thrilled to have her even though she thinks we live in Podunk and is, apparently, The Snow Queen.

But we still love her.  That’s just how she rolls.

The books are nearly unpacked.  Only ten boxes to go.

First it looked like this:

Then it looked like this:

And then it looked like this:

And then I died.

No?

Okay, and then I shelved all of those (except for the dog) because I ran out of room on the dining room floor.

And THEN I unpacked most of the remaining 30 or so boxes directly onto the shelves.  Alphabetically.  By author.  Which proved to be more difficult than I anticipated.  I know some people count on their fingers, but I found myself alphabetizing on my fingers.  That’s embarrassing to admit, but I know some of you must do it to and I just want you to know you’re in good company.

You don’t do that?  Oh.

Never mind.

Since we’ll be snowed in for a day or so, I think I’ll unpack and shelve the rest of the books and maybe the three boxes labeled “Random Surface Crap from Master Bedroom”.

I can’t wait.  It’ll be like Christmas in March.

Week 5 Post Movem

February 24th, 2009

Wouldn’t you think we’d be all settled in by now?

Me too.

But not quite.

We have definitely made progress.  We’re down to about this many boxes:

The bookshelves that divide the living room from the office are finally put together so we have somewhere to unload those last boxes.  The fussy little guy who helped us at Ikea made it clear that their Billy bookcases are NOT meant to be used as ROOM DIVIDERS because they should be ANCHORED to a WALL to ensure they won’t TIP and HURT or MAIM someone.  So I assured him we’d anchor them, which we did.  To each other.  Now if they fall, they won’t HURT or MAIM anyone because anyone unlucky enough to be under them will be DEAD.

The guest room, which has served as an attic for the last five weeks actually has a bed in it now (Thank you, Craig’s List) and a path cleared to the bed.

The kitchen is about 1/3 painted (except for the cabinets, which is making me twitchy so that will happen soon…)  The cabinets pictured below were a lucky Craig’s List find.  And you can see where the wall painting stopped…

We don’t have the budget or the energy right now to drywall the ceilings in the kitchen, hallway, and master bedroom so we will find attractive ceiling tiles to replace the crappy looking old ceiling tile that’s up there now.  Crappy old ceiling tile is common in summer homes, as this place used to be.  Fluorescent lights?  Not so much.  They are SO OUT OF HERE.  But I have to find someone to put up new fixtures as Yes,Dear isn’t allowed to mess around with electrical stuff because of his defibrillator.

What a wuss.

Daughter will be visiting for a week over her Spring Break, starting this weekend.  We can’t wait.  Son One might make it down for a couple of days while she’s here.  Son Two was down recently for a weekend which was great.  We explored Cape Henlopen State Park.  All the years we’ve been going to CHSP, you’d think we’d have seen it all but, believe me, when you’re with an experienced urban explorer you find things you never expect to.  See?

It’s an old WWII bunker with several rooms.  It’s about the size of a small house.  Off the beaten path.  Off limits.  Under a dune.  I’m just glad we didn’t get caught because I don’t want to end up in the local paper’s police blotter before I’ve met all our neighbors.  Wouldn’t want to start off on the wrong foot.

Speaking of neighbors, here are a few we met on a walk one morning:

Nutmeg asked what body of water it is that we can see from our house.  The Delaware River?  No.  The Schuylkill River?  Nope.  The ocean?  We wish.  It’s actually Indian River Bay and it’s lovely and sparkly and soothing to watch.

We are so happy it should be illegal.

The dogs are happy too, except early in the mornings when the hunters are out in the marsh at the end of the street.  Sebastian will NOT go outside while they’re shooting.  I don’t blame him.

Yes,Dear is unhappy because his garage is packed full of stuff from end to end, but we’ll get around to clearing it out eventually.  I made the movers put the fishing rods and beach chairs in the outside shower because if they stuffed even one more thing in that garage Yes,Dear would have killed me dead.

I’m almost caught up in my reader, although there are a few of you who I refuse to “mark as read” and who post ALL THE DAMN TIME.  Slow down, okay?  Let me catch up.  And then there’s Jack who disappeared himself while I was away.  Jack, I MISS YOU.  Please reconsider…

So.  After setting up our neighborhood library branch tomorrow, I should be back to a fairly relaxed schedule and therefore a more regular posting schedule.  It’ll be so great to be back!  As I mentioned in my previous post, stay tuned for pix of The Little Bayside Bungalow furnished almost exclusively by Craig’s List of Philadelphia, Freecycle, and The Salvation Army!

P.S.  Ruth, please, please, PLEASE tell me which store will be carrying your goodies so I can get the MOUSSE CAKE you and Bossy posted pictures of.  I WANT it.  I MUST HAVE it.  I WILL have it.  I’ll be in town this coming weekend to pick Daughter up at PHL and the following weekend for the Flower Show and my hips and I want to support your new enterprise…

Oh, yeah…

January 31st, 2009

I forgot to tell you.  I learned something this week about dogs.

If a dog pees in the snow in the yard, he will see no reason not to pee in the snow on the balcony.

Just thought I’d pass that along for anyone who is too dumb, like me, to think this through sufficiently before allowing it to happen.

Up for air…

January 31st, 2009

Hi!  How the heck are ya?  I’ve missed you guys!

Wait, I need a sandwich…

Ok, I’m back.

The move went fine smoothly.

Right.  The move went.

Actually, the move wasn’t bad except for all the sorting and packing and moving and unpacking and sorting and stuff like the freaking cold 16 degree day we moved in so the doors were open all day and stuff.  Oh, and when the movers were getting ready to leave after loading the first day we found a few small items they had forgotten, so we did a quick look-see to make sure they hadn’t forgotten anything else.  Other than the DRYER and the REFRIGERATOR, they hadn’t.  Oh.  My.  God.

And then there was the morning before the move when I was supposed to meet the movers at my friend’s garage so they could load all the booty I’ve collected from Craig’s List and Freecycle since we listed our old house a year and a half ago and they were an hour and a half late when I needed to be home to finish packing the kitchen so they could load it on their truck when they came to our house after emptying the garage and our storage units because they still had to clean up the muddy mess left by the OTHER moving crew the day before and I hadn’t showered or combed my hair (or brushed my teeth, I think, but I had no plans to kiss the movers so who cares) and I couldn’t stop crying tears of frustration and exhaustion and, oh, did I mention it was, like, 12 degrees that day? so the tears and the snot were freezing on my face until I dug around in my friend’s basement and found a roll of Viva paper towels and this crazed hysterical unkempt snot rocket that was me scared the movers so bad when they finally showed up they would have done anything for me except show up on time because it was already too late for that.

Oh, and the guy who bought our house didn’t even wait until we moved to cut down the huge fabulous trees that made the front yard look and feel like a park.  When we left only the trunks remained, standing in our yard like two sad totem poles.  We made sure the neighbors knew that the deforestation was the new owner’s fault.  Welcome to the neighborhood, you tree-hater, you!

Fortunately, both settlements went off without a hitch.  When we arrived at the new house, we looked around and headed for a hotel.  One more night (after two at the old house) on the Aerobed was simply out of the question.  We called the movers and told them we were not staying at the property and asked them to give us a call an hour before the truck would arrive in the morning so we could meet the movers at the property.  We got a call at 8:30 the next morning.  The movers were at the property.

We made them wait while we showered, dressed, had coffee and a bite to eat.

It was small of us and I know, I know, vengeance is mine sayeth the Lord and all that but, screw it, it was satisfying.

All went well with the unloading.  Nothing that couldn’t be fixed was broken, nothing was missing except for one leg to our TV armoire and a pair of crutches. We’re still finding items marked for the guest room in the garage and items marked for the garage in the guest room, but since they both start with the letter G, that’s an understandable mistake, right?

Oh, and for a while after the movers loaded it appeared that they had packed my sister’s cat litter scoop with our stuff.  And then a box of meat that had been removed from the freezer so the movers could take the refrigerator disappeared and we were concerned that it might be on the truck thawing out for three days next to our sofa, but we found it.

And the week we moved Buster had surgery to remove a benign tumor.  He was very good about his stitches and didn’t need an E-collar, but we considered getting one for Sebastian who kept licking Buster’s stitches.  Ew.  The dogs were boarded during most of the move because we didn’t feel the need to add to the fun and hilarity with incessant barking.

The unpacking is progressing, some days faster than others.  My office is still full of boxes because in our old house, we HAD WALLS.  The new house is a more open floor plan downstairs and has rooms built under sloping eaves upstairs and what does one do with all the wall art when moving from a traditional walled house to a house with an open floor plan?  One leaves boxes of pictures in one’s office.

We’re getting there.  We were actually able to relax a bit when it snowed the other day and enjoy our snow-covered view.  Boy howdy, let me tell you, a couple inches of snow down here throws the locals into a tizz.

I’m going to sign off now because I have no doubt bored you to tears.  Hope you have a roll of Viva handy.

Besides, I’ve got more unpacking to do (the kitchen spices, I think, are still on the screened porch.)

So, I’m glad to be back and I can’t wait to catch up with all that’s going on with YOU.

And soon, once the settling in is a little more, well, settled, I’ll post pictures of the fabulous house furnished exclusively by Craig’s List of Philadelphia, Freecycle and The Salvation Army.  Stay tuned, you won’t want to miss that.

I do love a bargain.

P.S.  Yes,Dear and I had an argument about the stove in the new house.  “We need a new stove,” I’d say.  “Why?” he’d ask.  “Because the one that’s there is brown,” I’d explain.  “But it works,” he’d respond.  “But it’s brown,” I’d say.  This went on and on.  Well, we got a brand new white stove, but now he expects me to USE it to, like, cook and stuff.  So who won this argument?  I’m not sure.

Overwhelmed

January 12th, 2009

This was yesterday.  You should SEE the pile now.

The movers are coming at 8 a.m. on Tuesday.  I still have to pack my office, the kitchen, and my bedroom, but I had to take tonight off.  The need for a break became embarrassingly apparent when I asked for a box of “chocolate nuggets” at the Dunkin Donuts drivethru and then, at home, wandered aimlessly around for 45 minutes mumbling where’s my tape gun over and over and over.  It was in my hand.

Speaking of over, this can’t be over soon enough.

Also, you find some weird stuff when you move.  After Son One moved out the other day, I began loading a box of stuff he forgot.  It looked like this:

Yes, that’s a sword.  I’m going to have to take it to him because taking it home on the bus might be problematic for him.  And since we’re just about to buy a house, bailing him out would be out of the question.

Wish us luck finishing up tomorrow.  We’re going to need it!

Update

December 20th, 2008

We got the house.  Yay!

4 Shopping Days Left.  Have not started.

24 Packing Days Left.  Have not started.

0 time left until panic sets in.

I’m one for three…

The Adventure Begins…

December 16th, 2008

When One sells a house it’s always a good idea to have somewhere to move TO, especially when One has to hit the bricks in say, oh, 30 DAYS.

Thus, if One is smart, One begins house hunting immediately which One has been doing compulsively for two years already, but now it’s time to actually VISIT some of the places One has been stalking online.  So One undertakes a journey, meets with a Realtor, and visits the three most promising homes currently available in One’s price range.

And then, if One is me and Yes,Dear (which I guess, technically, would be Two), One chooses to make an offer on the only house of the three One likes and the one, apparently, whose owners appear to disagree, now that they have an offer,  about whether they actually want to sell.

And One sits and twiddles One’s thumbs, all four of them, and taps One’s feet - and I don’t mean gentle tapping; picture instead Michael Flatley of Lord of the Dance - waiting for a response to One’s offer while the property owners debate whether to actually sell the property they apparently agreed to put on the market over two months ago.

One is stressing.  One is overeating.  One is playing game after game of Spider Solitaire.  One is constantly checking for voice mails and/or emails from One’s Realtor.

One should be packing and hiring movers so One is prepared in very short order to move to…

Yeah, exactly.

It’s not even as if this is a super great house.  It is a good house.  It has good bones.  It needs some cosmetics, but nothing too far outside One’s skills and abilities and hopefully within One’s budget.

But THAT VIEW.

One would live in a BOX to wake up to that every morning.

One needs a drink.

IT HAS FINALLY HAPPENED, INTERNETS!!!

December 15th, 2008

We have to be out January 15th.  Talk about HERE’S YOUR HAT, WHAT’S YOUR HURRY?

We can do this.  It will be kind of like moving a circus, but without any elephants to clean up after, so I guess that’s better, right?

Eh, it’s all good.  Because we’re headed here (we say knocking on wood, spinning, clicking our ruby slippers and spitting twice over our left shoulders):

Posting for the next few weeks will be sporadic and will probably consist of the following:

AAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHH…

ACK!

OH MY ACHING BACK!!!

WHERE’S THE FREAKING TAPE?

WHAT DO YOU MEAN, DIDN’T I CALL THE MOVERS?  I TOLD YOU TO CALL THE MOVERS!

WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU PACKED MY ZOLOFT?

Christmas?  Christmas, you say?  How are we going to do Christmas with all this crazy going on?  We’re going to get a TREE.  And we’re going to DECORATE it.  Then we’re going to sing Silent Night around the tree on Christmas Eve and Joy to the World on Christmas morning.  The kids will unwrap their gifts which will consist of a clementine, a walnut, and a tape gun.  Then we’ll pack and pack some more.  We’ll put ribbons on all of the packed boxes because we are festive people.

Any moving hints, tips, tricks, or excellent drink recipes you wish to share to help us through this would be most welcome.

Signals…

December 3rd, 2008

Lately there’s an awful lot of signaling going on.  The Fed signals this, the Treasury signals that.  The President signals something or other and I’m all like, for pete’s sake, if you have something to say, just come out and say it, will ya?

And then our house signaled.  The holding tank on the heater said pfffffttttt, SPLASH.  Then the porch light committed suicide.  Just fell right off the wall.  No wind, no rain, nothing.  Just PLUNK, like the house knows we’re trying to sell it and it’s MAD.  And NOW I’m all like, jeez, just keep it to yourself, will ya?

Because if the house were to “come right out and say it”, I have a feeling things could get UGLY.

Thanksgiving Week

December 1st, 2008

It was the best most aggravating of times, it was the worst of times.

The feast was good if I do say so myself.  Maybe that’s because I’ve had so much practice cooking it. Each and every year.  Forever and ever, amen.

Our house guest, who arrived last Monday, left this morning.

House Guest, my nearly 70 year old bachelor uncle, comes every year for a week at Thanksgiving.  House Guest was married for a short time during the 1960’s (I’m not sure how much of it he remembers, not because he’s old but because it was, well, the ’60’s and he was, after all, a hippie).  He pretty much stayed in school until he was forty, at which time he got a real job.  He retired six years ago.  When he retired, he bought his first home out west.  Prior to that, House Guest had rented a small apartment, so home ownership has been a real eye opener for him.  He never had children.  He is socially awkward.  He is curmudgeonly.  He is highly intelligent and WAY educated which he feels obligates him to impart wisdom, little of which is based on real life experience, ALL. THE. DAMN. TIME.

He tells me how to raise my kids.

He demands to see my electric bill so he can evaluate our kilowatt usage (we squander electricity).

He teases the kids.  He gives them advice.

He teases the dogs.  He gives them a bowl of wine.

He tries to give the dogs peppercorns.  I stop him just in time.

He tells me that reading fiction is a waste of time because “it’s all made up”.  I should be reading HISTORY and learning something, he says.  He is also intellectually snobby about movies.  Entertainment for the sake of entertainment is a waste of time.

He doesn’t own a TV, yet he spends quite a bit of time in front of ours, watching avidly while complaining about how insipid and uninspiring TV is to the point where he DOTH protest TOO MUCH, you know?

After Yes,Dear strips the turkey and refrigerates the leftovers, House Guest attacks the carcass muttering about “wasting perfectly good food”.  He strips off another pound or so of what he calls “meat” and what I would refer to as OFFAL.  I freeze it to discard after he leaves.

He complains about my driving.  Constantly.  In an annoying, passive-aggressive way.

He is a reformed smoker who keeps telling me that cigarettes are going to kill me.  What he doesn’t know is that I’m smoking like crazy, praying they’ll kill me before he tells me that again.

Yet I love him.  He’s family.  So we grin and bear it as I’m sure he does, being that he lives alone all year with the exception of this one week, which I’m sure probably makes him very glad to go home and live alone for another year.

I try to plan ahead for his visits.  We schedule some entertaining (but not time wasting) outings.  Sometimes it’s a movie, always it’s a trip to a local museum, and usually an afternoon in a book store.

This year, we went to the Philadelphia Museum of Art where we saw a beautiful exhibit of quilts from Gee’s Bend, GA, an exhibit of soot and spit art that was really interesting, a landscape exhibit that was disappointing although if you’re partial to Elvis on Velvet you might enjoy it.  We visited the Modern & Contemporary Art exhibit hall.  Meh.

I did learn something interesting though, which made the trip totally worthwhile:

Apparently a few hundred years and several lives ago, my mother in law was a child model.  The resemblance is uncanny, as is the disapproving expression: